TIME’s Breastfeeding Cover – Thoughts from a Breastfeeding Momma

If you’ve been online, you’ve undoubtedly seen the TIME’s breastfeeding cover.  It is a controversial one and it has ALL of the opinions of the Internet coming out – for better and for worse.

The cover, to me, was simply shot for ultimate shock value and to sell magazines (why else would this boy be standing on a chair to nurse?) but I take zero issue with the extended breastfeeding happening on the magazine cover.

I am still nursing my nearly eighteen month old daughter Willow.  It is a relationship that I cherish and could not picture my days without this being a part of it.  She loves it too.  She will walk over to me and sign/say “more” and when I ask, “More what Willow?” she looks at me and says, “More momma.”  At night, she will walk over to the rocking chair in her room, pat the seat and say, “On. Momma, on” and she knows that I will sit down, scoop her up and nurse her to sleep for the thousandth time.

When she falls or gets a little bump, I nurse her to calm her down.  When we were in the children’s hospital and she was in tachycardia (her heart rate was 225bpm), I told the hospital staff to let me nurse her and it brought her heart rate down to normal and potentially saved her from a scary situation.  In short, it’s a situation that I am incredibly happy to be in and to be honest, I can not even imagine navigating parenthood without breastfeeding.

A cover like this one brings out some very interesting opinions.  Opinions that make me really sad.  It makes me sad because I like to think that our society is evolving, is open and is accepting.  However, not all people are.  In the issue of extended breastfeeding, it seems that a lot of people are extremely opinionated and the majority of those opinions are coming from people who have never breastfed, who have never done extended breastfeeding and who simply sit back and apply a label.  Apply an opinion.  Apply a judgement.

I could go on and on in anger about people’s opinions but it won’t change anything.  I simply ask that if you are one of those people who think breastfeeding past the age of one is “gross” or “incestual” or “wrong” and if you believe in silly sayings like, “When your baby gets teeth, wean them off the boob” or “If they can ask for it, it’s no longer acceptable”, take stop for a moment, ask yourself why and reconsider.  Consider alternate viewpoints and think about you and your children (or your family if you do not have children).  Think about all of the things you do in your day, decisions you make for the well-being of your child and ask yourself, “How would I feel if I were scrutinized?”

Wake up tomorrow with the notion that you will be a more loving, accepting and open-minded individual and see what happens.  It may very well surprise you.

Time to Wean From Breastfeeding?

In three days from now, I’ll celebrate a milestone with my wee Willow.  We will have made it to 17 months breastfeeding.  As I write that, I’m filled with a mix of emotions.  I’m so proud of myself yet I’m also a little exhausted just thinking about it.  Breastfeeding and practicing attachment parenting while running a company and maintaining an active social life is HARD WORK!

Over the past 17 months, I’ve nursed my child to sleep every single time (except for a handful of times when I was away from her), I’ve nursed her every single time she hurt herself, I’ve nursed her when she was sick, I’ve nursed her when she needed a little cuddle and I’ve nursed her when she first signed “more” and later asked for mama.

I’ve nursed her on a plane numerous times, in doctor’s offices, in parks, in a movie theatre, in the front and back seat of my car, in Wal-Mart, in a mall, while sitting at my desk working, in restaurants and anywhere else the need to feed my child arose.

I have slathered my nipples in Jack Newman’s breastfeeding ointment more times than I can count, I’ve suffered through “rusty pipe syndrome”, worried about foremilk/hindmilk imbalances, spent hours trying to wake my sleepy newborn to eat, dealt with growth spurts/cluster feeding, navigated through proper latches and different feeding positions, wore nipple shields, pumped for hours and dealt with opinions from strangers on the way I am feeding my child (mostly good, some not so good).

But now, at 17 months, I wonder if we’ve reached our end.

Willow, for the past week or so, has started biting me nearly every feeding.  She seems way less interested in nursing and will only nurse for a few minutes before getting bored and moving on.  The only nursing sessions that she actually does well with are those right before bed.  Otherwise, she’s turned into an “angry nurser” and it’s killing both my spirits and my nipples.

I’ve done all kinds of things to get the biting to stop: I’ve tried removing her before she gets to the “done eating, play now” phase, I’ve unlatched her and told her no while setting her down, I’ve tried pushing her face (gently) into my breast when she bites so that she experiences something unpleasant after she bites but I’m seriously at a loss here.

It used to be that she’d nurse while we co-slept and those sessions were peaceful and always amongst my favourite. Now those sessions are horrendous for my nipples as she pulls back (with my nipple still in her mouth), bites and creates a super lazy latch, which causes problems for me.

So I’m not really sure what to do.  Is it time to wean her?  Is this her way of saying that she’s no longer interested in nursing?  Or, is this just a passing phase?  My goal was to nurse her until she was 2 years old but at this point, I don’t even want to nurse her one more time.  I think I might be reaching my breaking point too (and I know this to be true because writing that phrase six months ago would have induced tears for me… now it almost induces relief).

The only thing I’m worried about is that if I do wean her, how the heck do I get her to sleep?  We’ve only ever nursed her to sleep so I have no idea what I would do there.

Leave some advice, if you have any, in the comments!  I really need to know if this is normal behavior, how to get through it or if you think that she might be ready to just wean from nursing.  Thanks in advance!