TIME’s Breastfeeding Cover – Thoughts from a Breastfeeding Momma

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If you’ve been online, you’ve undoubtedly seen the TIME’s breastfeeding cover.  It is a controversial one and it has ALL of the opinions of the Internet coming out – for better and for worse.

The cover, to me, was simply shot for ultimate shock value and to sell magazines (why else would this boy be standing on a chair to nurse?) but I take zero issue with the extended breastfeeding happening on the magazine cover.

I am still nursing my nearly eighteen month old daughter Willow.  It is a relationship that I cherish and could not picture my days without this being a part of it.  She loves it too.  She will walk over to me and sign/say “more” and when I ask, “More what Willow?” she looks at me and says, “More momma.”  At night, she will walk over to the rocking chair in her room, pat the seat and say, “On. Momma, on” and she knows that I will sit down, scoop her up and nurse her to sleep for the thousandth time.

When she falls or gets a little bump, I nurse her to calm her down.  When we were in the children’s hospital and she was in tachycardia (her heart rate was 225bpm), I told the hospital staff to let me nurse her and it brought her heart rate down to normal and potentially saved her from a scary situation.  In short, it’s a situation that I am incredibly happy to be in and to be honest, I can not even imagine navigating parenthood without breastfeeding.

A cover like this one brings out some very interesting opinions.  Opinions that make me really sad.  It makes me sad because I like to think that our society is evolving, is open and is accepting.  However, not all people are.  In the issue of extended breastfeeding, it seems that a lot of people are extremely opinionated and the majority of those opinions are coming from people who have never breastfed, who have never done extended breastfeeding and who simply sit back and apply a label.  Apply an opinion.  Apply a judgement.

I could go on and on in anger about people’s opinions but it won’t change anything.  I simply ask that if you are one of those people who think breastfeeding past the age of one is “gross” or “incestual” or “wrong” and if you believe in silly sayings like, “When your baby gets teeth, wean them off the boob” or “If they can ask for it, it’s no longer acceptable”, take stop for a moment, ask yourself why and reconsider.  Consider alternate viewpoints and think about you and your children (or your family if you do not have children).  Think about all of the things you do in your day, decisions you make for the well-being of your child and ask yourself, “How would I feel if I were scrutinized?”

Wake up tomorrow with the notion that you will be a more loving, accepting and open-minded individual and see what happens.  It may very well surprise you.

  • Greg

    I always saw age 2 as being my “limit” (I had never been a dad, had never investigated or understood so-called attachment parenting). My son is now just shy of 3, and will be breastfeeding for a while longer. What I love is that he understands that it is nurturing. He said to us the other day, “When I grow up and you grow down, I will take care of you and give you milkies.”

    Not sure how raising a boy to appreciate nurturing and projecting into the future to a time when he wants to take care of us is a bad thing.

    • http://www.bsetc.com Erin Blaskie

      Greg, this might sound cheesy but your comment literally brought tears to my eyes and made me want to reach through this screen and hug your wee man!

      You know, I was the same before I had Willow.  I always said that I’d “try” breastfeeding and definitely go to six months.  Then I started breastfeeding and realized that I loved it and she loved it too.  We reached six months and I said, “Oh, definitely nursing to a year.”  Well… we’re at eighteen months now and I can’t see an end in sight yet.

  • Kristine Read

    I wish women in generally would stop making Mom’s and their choices feel bad for them.  I wish we lived in a world were women could support each other and stop the judging.  And I mean that both ways whether you chose not to breastfeed at all to those that do extended breastfeeding. Did I breastfeed my child until they were three like the supposed magazine cover?  No…  is it for me?  No, but I by no means disprespect someone who does.  But I would also like to ask that same Mother not to think I am anyless of a Mother for not…whatever the reason may be.

  • multitestingmommy

    I love this  ”Wake up tomorrow with the notion that you will be a more loving, accepting and open-minded individual and see what happens”!  Great post. There are so many mixed views on this topic as with MANY topics regarding parenting etc., my mentality is everyone should do what is best for them, their children and their family and that no one should judge them for it! 

  • http://thekoalabearwriter.blogspot.ca/ Bonnie Way

    I really don’t like the new Time magazine cover because it is sensationalist and will bring out all these negative opinions.  With my first daughter, my goal was to nurse her to one year, and by 14 months she and I were both ready to be done and sort of stopped doing it.  It was a mutual decision.  My second daughter is almost two and still nurses all the time (she calls it “napping” which I find very cute but, like your son, she knows how to ask for what she wants and she does).  I’m honestly quite okay with nursing her, and so is she, so I don’t know when we’ll stop.  Our society in general does seem to believe that only babies nurse, but in other cultures, it is COMPLETELY normal for children to nurse until they are three or four.  That said, pictures like this by Time cast a negative light on breastfeeding, child-led weaning, attachment parenting (and Dr. Sears).  It makes us seem like weirdos.

  • Deborah St Jean

    I believe in baby lead weaning to up to four years of age.  If a child feels the need to nurse for longer than this, I suspect there is something wrong in their world that they are compensating for by wanting to continue to nurse.  Under extenuating circumstances that are beyond the parent’s control (illness, development issues) nursing longer than this age, may be appropriate, but it would be better to address the real need instead.  Having said that, I believe the cover does a disservice to breastfeeding in general which is unfortunate.  

  • sarah d.

    Hi Erin. 

    I have been a silent reader of your blog for a while now.  I first found you through you tube in late 2010 when I started watching your weekly pregnancy vlogs during my pregnancy.  My daughter is now 12 months old and we still breast feed and co-sleep.  Like you, I love breastfeeding and so does my daughter.  I have had many people ask me if I will continue to nurse now that she is a year old, my answer is always, “yes”.  Their next question is, “well, how long are you going to nurse her?…until she’s six?!”  These questions really upset me.  It’s as though they believe just because I’ve decided to nurse past a year, I will nurse her forever.  Yes, there will be an end date.   And I agree with you, those who have the negative opinions are not educated on breast feeding.  We do what we can to keep our children healthy and happy.  That is all that should matter. 

    I did want to ask you, if you don’t mind….how is your sleeping situation now that Willow is 18 months old?  Are you still co-sleeping?

    Thanks!
    Sarah D.

    • Bingo

       Nah